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March 09, 2006
Something New
I begin this simply because I want there to be something new to read on this blog. But I have no idea yet what I am going to say.
I used to journal obsessively. I think that's why it's hard for me to just start writing . When I write in a journal, I know I'm the only one who will ever read it. So I say whatever i want to. But sometimes when I sit down to write on this blog, I feel like I'm trying to come up with an essay for my 9th grade English class.
I am so glad...immeasureably glad...that high school is over for me. Ugh. All of that homework every single night of my life for all of those years. All of those exams...chemistry, trigonometry, algebra...the thought of it makes me feel ill. But most of all, the social stress was just incredible.
I actually am relatively introverted and shy--if I'm going to be honest. But I act like an extrovert a lot because that's what I've always done. I used to act a lot more outgoing than I do now. When I was a new girl in school in 9th grade, it was almost a full time job to keep up this persona of an extroverted, very happy girl. I figured that I was more likely to make friends if I was friendly and outgoing. And I had been so lonely in junior high that I decided I never wanted to be lonely again, and that I would become whatever I needed to become to make sure that didn't happen. And I did make friends. But I expended so much energy at school that my mom says I didn't talk at all when I came home in the afternoon for the first three months.
Then when I went to college, I was basically a hermit. I was just completely burned-out from high school. I was so terrified of people that I sometimes wouldn't go out of my dorm room even if I was hungry and needed to eat at the dining hall. Most of the time I still feel that way, but since I have a family, I need to go out. I've told friends before that I wish I could go out in a burka. I'm not saying that I think anyone should be forced to wear one of those things. But I think it would be very handy to be able to hide even while walking around.
i guess if I was the only one wearing a burka around on a regular basis, pretty soon everyone would figure out it was me.
I'm going to now post this before I change my mind and erase absolutely everything, which I have done a number of times before. Ta ta all, have a good night's sleep.
Posted by darby on March 9, 2006 08:31 PM
Comments
i know what you mean about the burka, which is why i loved wearing a polar hood getting around campus in the cold. I'd see people I knew and just get away with walking by without stopping and chatting. wonderufl.
Posted by: jason on March 10, 2006 11:03 PM
Yes! To this day, I cannot walk by a polar hood without remembering Jase riding around Newark being so pleased by his complete state of anonymousness (and yes, that is a word!). I don't know what it is, but I sometimes have that same feeling; that compulsion to simply turn around before that person you know in the grocery store recognizes you (but, it's pretty awkward if they catch you in the act!), or that wonderful realization that when the phone rings, you don't have to pick it up (let's face it: every Latshaw has that and we will continue to maintain that it is healthy). Sometimes going out in public can be a dangerous gamble cause we all know there are people out there who we don't want to see--now or maybe ever. So Darby, maybe you have revealed the real reason all those muslim women wear burkas--maybe, just maybe, they are avoiding each other and a number of awkward conversations without offending each other cause religiously, they have to! And secretly, all those women breathe a collective sigh of relief for more reasons than are found in the Koran.
Posted by: Jessica on March 11, 2006 03:03 AM
Anonymity. It will save you some syllables.
Posted by: Anon on March 11, 2006 09:30 AM
No, really--I looked it up in the dictionary and "anonymousness" really is a word. And maybe I don't feel the need to save syllables. I am comfortable with using them--even a lot of them.
Posted by: Jessica on March 11, 2006 08:26 PM
don't anonymousness and Anonymity have the same amount of syllables? 5?
a-non-ym-ous-ness
a-no-nym-i-ty
Posted by: jason on March 11, 2006 09:53 PM
Darbs, I like the burka idea. Here's what I'm thinking: we can both wear them and then no one will know which of us is out there in disguse. And if we can get just a few others to join us then we can all enjoy the benefits of burka wearing! Any takers?
Posted by: min on March 11, 2006 11:08 PM
I'm in!
Posted by: Ian on March 11, 2006 11:56 PM
they really don't cost that much, you know. they'd make good christmas presents.
myself, I'm just going to start wearing a girdle.
Posted by: jason on March 12, 2006 12:34 AM
Okay. So, I used to date someone who worked for verizon who happened to be the main sponsors for the N'Sync tour, No Strings Attached...The reason I say all this is because he was privy to inside information that he shared with me: Chris Kirkpatrick of N'Sync was forced to wear a girdle while touring.
So, sorry Jase. it's already been done.
Posted by: Jessica on March 12, 2006 03:28 AM
Darby, it's even scarier writing online for all your friends to see than having old Mr. Bird grade your 9th grade essay. At least you don't have to worry about cracking Mr. Bird up or saying something so profound and extraordinary that you take everyone's breath away! It's a hard life keeping up with a blog and for that, I honor you! Keep up the profound and hilarious posts!!
Posted by: Jonathan Latshaw on March 13, 2006 10:55 PM
Seriously darb, I think you should adopt my approach. Make everyone think that you are intimidating and mean. Then you can be nice to the ones you want to be friends with and they will be like, "At first I was scared, but she is really so nice" and the people you don't like will still be scared of you. Works like a charm. Or we can all wear jedi cloaks, like the bud-bud, and look like yoda from behind.
Posted by: mers on March 14, 2006 04:41 PM